you ever wanna fuck the living shit outta somebody but also cook for them and make sure they’re emotionally stable?
don’t date anyone who doesn’t think hawkeye is a valuable member of the avengers
In Marvel fandom we don’t say “I love you”, we hug you uncomfortably long and whisper “Hail HYDRA,” which roughly translates to “I joined a group that splintered off from the Nazis for being too radical just to be close to you.” I think that’s more creepy than beautiful, but whatever works for you, I guess.
how to seduce a boy:
Step 1: look deep into his eyes
Step 2: smile a little
Step 3: bite your lip
Step 4: lean in so your lips are right next to his ear
Step 5: “heil hydra”
additionally, I CANNOT GET OVER Steve’s fucking Sadness Errands that he keeps running around DC, like, his schedule literally goes
6 AM: jogging
7:15: unburden soul to total stranger, lacking better options
3 PM: visit own museum exhibit to stare at the Dead Best Friend Wall
4:30: attempt meaningful human connection with sole surviving contemporary; fail due to Alzheimer’s
6 PM: dinner for one
7 PM: contemplate own loneliness, probably